Laugh Track: Mascot Misdemeanor

TBS’ Conan O’Brien: “A Texas woman is suing the Houston Astros for $1 million because she said the Astros' mascot, Orbit, permanently injured her finger with a T-shirt cannon. ... I'm kind of worried because the other night, we had a similar situation during our pre-show warm-up.” The broadcast then aired video from a recent show where a masked O'Brien starting shooting T-shirts into the crowd, but unfortunately one of them impaled an elderly audience member. The elderly man said, “I just beat cancer” (“Conan,” TBS, 4/10).

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Actress Jodie Comer appeared on NBC’s “Late Night” last night. Comer is a native of Liverpool, England, and her father is a massage therapist for EPL club Everton F.C. Comer: "If he had a beard at the time and they were winning, then that beard would just continue and continue until they lost a game.” Host Seth Meyers, a West Ham United supporter, said, “Based on my knowledge of Everton, his beard probably never got that long” (“Late Night,” NBC, 4/10).