Laugh Track....The Lake Show

NBC’s Jay Leno: “What are the Lakers doing? What's going on there? They have lost 9 of their last 10 games. In fact, the Lakers are so bad, now when someone mentions the Laker Girls, they think they're talking about the starting lineup. That's how bad it is. Here’s how bad they are. You know who the team doctor is? Conrad Murray, that’s how bad it is. In fact it is so bad, Jack Nicholson doesn't go to the games any more. You know why: He can't handle the truth!” (“The Tonight Show,” NBC, 1/10).

CBS’ David Letterman: “Baseball had their annual induction announcement into the Hall of Fame, and three managers inducted, all named Whitey. To be eligible for the Hall of Fame, you must have been retired for five years. Which means Mariano Rivera will be, when he's inducted, 93” (“Late Show,” CBS, 1/10).