Comedy Central’s "The Colbert Report" last night aired its “Stephen Colbert’s Sport Report” segment, which is modeled after ESPN’s “SportsCenter.” Host Stephen Colbert said, “I’m no fan, but soccer is Europe’s most popular sport, right behind competitive three-ways. Incredible ballhandling. But now, there is a dark cloud on soccer’s horizon.” The broadcast aired news reports on the ongoing match-fixing scandal, with Colbert saying he was “shocked” because “who would have thought there was anything fake about soccer.” The show aired clips of players faking injuries and taking dives. ESPN's Alexi Lalas appeared on the broadcast, with Colbert saying Lalas was “here to move the discussion forward without using his hands.” Lalas said, “I’m here to tell that the U.S. and in particular, Major League Soccer, is clean.” Colbert asked, “Can you trust anything about a game where players are routinely smacking themselves in the face with other people’s hands?” Lalas: “Don’t be a boob, Stephen. … I don’t hate you because you have that view of soccer. I pity you because you don’t understand the beautiful game.” Colbert added, “I may not be able to rise to the level of appreciating 0-0” (“The Colbert Report,” Comedy Central, 2/20).
Actor Hugh Jackman appeared on CBS’ “Late Show” last night to promote his latest film, “Les Miserables.” Jackman said of trying to influence his son to be interested in sports, “He’s not interested in any of it, none of it. I bribe him to go to Knicks games.” CBS’ David Letterman replied, “Well, a lot of people have to be bribed to go to the Knicks games” (“Late Show,” CBS, 2/20).
ABC’s Jimmy Kimmel: “As of yesterday, Los Angeles became the first city in the world to synchronize every one of its traffic lights. … If this is as successful as they hope it will be, synchronized traffic lights could become an event in the next Olympics. … Florida Atlantic University just announced a new corporate sponsor for their new football stadium. It’s the GEO Group, which happens to be America’s second-largest operator of for-profit prisons. The stadium’s being sponsored by prisons. I guess they figured a lot of the athletes end up in prison anyway and this just cuts out a step. The GEO Group paid $6 million for the naming rights, but the school says very little will change. The only change they're making is hot dogs will now go for two packs of cigarettes” (“Jimmy Kimmel Live,” ABC, 2/20).
