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Volume 24 No. 160
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LETTERMAN'S TOP TEN: LEAST SUCCESSFUL BASEBALL PROMOTIONS

          David Letterman's "Top Ten" list of "Least Successful     Baseball Promotions" ("Late Show," CBS, 6/29).               
10) Sticky seat night
9) Get a free piece of that crappy gum that comes with baseball cards
8) Win Tommy Lasorda's pre-Slimfast pants
7) Ticket stub night
6) Get hit in the face by a 90-mph fastball
5) Completely obstructed seating day
4) Babe Ruth's last surviving hooker gives you the opportunity to catch the Clap
3) Keep the beachball going or die
2) Steinbrenner fires your ass
1) "Nothin' but bunts"