NBC’s Jay Leno: “Homeland security today warned airlines flying to Russia to be on the lookout for passengers’ toothpaste tubes. They say the toothpaste may contain bombs, exploding toothpaste. Can you imagine? The only airline not worried about this, British Airways. ... Some of the hotels they built in Sochi are so bad. The rooms have no light bulbs, no shower curtains and no hot water, or as we call that, Motel 6. Actually, they say the Internet is so bad in Sochi that as soon as you log on to your computer or phone, it's immediately hacked and your information is stolen. I didn't even know they had Target stores over there” (“The Tonight Show,” NBC, 2/6).
CBS’ David Letterman said, “Tomorrow night the Olympics begin from Russia. … A lot of people who go over there, athletes and everybody, they’re saying, ‘The hotels stink here in Sochi,’ and I was stunned to hear that. The problem is there are only three hotels in Sochi. Of course, you have the Ritz Chernobyl. You have the Sheraton Gulag and really the best one over there, the Two Seasons. In Sochi, when they tell you that your room is not ready, what they really mean is it hasn't been built yet. They're very good at their turndown service. Whatever you want in the hotel they will turn you down. … The hotels are lousy. The Olympic Village is a mess. The food is horrible. Well, that's what happens when you piss off gay people” (“Late Show,” CBS, 2/6).
Comedy Central's Stephen Colbert: "The Opening Ceremony for the 2014 Winter Olympics are just one day away which, of course, is the Silver Medal of them starting today. In the run-up to these Games, Vladimir Putin has gotten a lot of criticism for anti-gay laws, for bulldozing poor neighborhoods to build Olympic facilities and now harshest of all, for his yogurt blockade." A large shipment of Chobani yogurt is being held up in the U.S. because "our athletes' yogurt is being embargoed but it is only because the Russians want to protect traditional family values because let's face it, it's no secret that yogurt is the gayest dairy product. First of all, it’s Greek style, it longs to be in the mouth of John Stamos and need I mention, fruit on the bottom" ("The Colbert Report," Comedy Central, 2/6).
Comedy Central's Jon Stewart said, "Even long after the Seattle Seahawks celebrated Sunday's 'Bring the Broncos To Work Day,' one Super Bowl controversy rages on." The Coca-Cola "America the Beautiful" ad is receiving criticism for singing the song in multiple languages, but Stewart asked, "What happened? Did Janet Jackson open a Coke can with her teet?" ("The Daily Show With Jon Stewart," Comedy Central, 2/6).
