Laugh Track: Miami Vice

NBC’s Jimmy Fallon: “Looks like Derek Jeter and Jeb Bush will be buying the Miami Marlins. That’s right, one guy who could have been president and Jeb Bush” (“The Tonight Show,” NBC, 4/26).

CBS’ Stephen Colbert: “It looks like baseball's Miami Marlins are going to be sold to a group led by Derek Jeter and Jeb Bush, or as they're known by their celebrity couple name, ‘Derek Jeter.’ … Baseball apparently very popular with republican dynasties because -- this is true -- look who just got edged out from buying the team, Tagg Romney. I think this isn't fair. I think a guy name Tagg should really own a baseball team, the same way the Knicks should be owned by billionaire Dunk Hooperson” (“The Late Show,” CBS, 4/26).