Top Ten....You've Got Mail

Last night’s Top Ten list was “Top Ten Surprises At The Hillary Clinton Press Conference.” Letterman said, “Earlier today, Hillary Clinton held a press conference to answer questions about the e-mail account, and I guess the deal is the account was not secure, so therefore state secrets were being passed around through www.pantsuit.com” (“Late Show,” CBS, 3/10).

10) “Entered whistling the ‘Hail to the Chief.’”
9) “Scrolled through e-mail on her iPad saying, ‘Can't show you that one...no, not that one...’”
8) “Different Hillary Clinton.”
7) “Between questions, took swigs of Kahlua.”
6) “Halfway through the proceedings sent a colleague out to buy melons.”
5) “Answered all questions by saying, ‘I'm just here so I don't get fined.’”
4) “Blamed the whole thing on North Korean hackers.”
3) "’Misheard’ question about Benghazi as a question about Ben Gazarra.”
2) “Waving wad of cash, said, ‘What'll it take to make this go away?’”
1) “At conclusion of press conference, asked everyone to delete her remarks.”