Top Ten....Father Knows Best

Friday night’s Top Ten list was “Top Ten Things Said in Jesus’ Household.” CBS’ David Letterman said, “In a new book entitled ‘Lost Gospel’ the authors claim Jesus was married and fathered two children. Good for him” (“Late Show,” CBS, 11/11).

10) “Fish and loaves again?”
9) “Don’t you kids ever put down your stone tablets?”
8) “Be nice to grandpa or he’ll flood the planet again.”
7) “Honey, can we please have one dinner without lepers?”
6) “Mucho gusto encantado (No, I’m sorry, that’s something overheard in the Jesus household).”
5) “Take down the Christmas lights already.”
4) “I was at the brothel for…biblical reason…”
3) “What would be a miracle is if someone did the dishes.”
2) “It’s been three days -- where have you been?”
1) “I wasn’t calling you; I just hit my thumb with a hammer.”