Top Ten....Genetics For Dummies

Friday night’s “Top Ten List” was “Top Ten Signs You May Have The Stupidity Virus.” Letterman said, “Scientists at Johns Hopkins University and the University of Nebraska have located a virus that attacks human DNA and they believe that this virus could cause people to be dumb. If your DNA is contacted by this virus, you could be less intelligent” ("Late Show,” CBS, 11/21).

10) “You just bought Jets season tickets.”
9) “You think Al Pacino is a drink at Starbucks.”
8) “You’re looking for a winter home in Buffalo.”
7) “You’re the reason they print ‘Do Not Eat’ on silica packets.”
6) “You’ve booked yourself a cruise to nowhere.’”
5) “The ‘iPhone’ you’re using is actually a Pop-Tart.”
4) “You’re baffled by a hat that came without instructions.”
3) “As a reminder, on your palm, you’ve written ‘Huh?’”
2) “You’re a grown man who recites lists on television.”
1) “You’re engaged to Charles Manson.”